New York to Florida Top Ten

Saturday, May 30, 2009

1.  Service dog-- a golden retriever-- who stood in the aisle for part of the flight.  He barked at intervals, as if to alert his owner to something.  They were seated in the first non-first-class row, and the dog did not respect the first-class/coach boundary.  He enjoyed being pet by a few people in coach.  No one in first class pet him. 

2.  Why do so many people (often men) like to stand in my personal space in lines?  And why do I think it's so funny to say, "Crawling up my ass will cost you extra" (in my head)? 

3.  Lady across the aisle had a special edition People magazine-- all celebrity crossword puzzles.  She stared at the Paul Newman one for a while, but didn't fill anything in.  Then she turned to the J. Lo puzzle (entitled "J. Lo and Behold") and did that one. 

4.  Earplugs

5.  Later, noise-reducing headphones and music.  TC Mix #1.  Good traveling music. 

6.  I liked the clash of accents on the first flight.  One guy sounded exactly like Al Gore.  When we landed, an extremely loud woman with a New York accent called someone and shouted into her phone, "We've landed!"  Some of the people around me chuckled and looked bemused. 

7.  Bruce Nauman article in the New Yorker.  I enjoyed it, but it made me want to read one about Susan Rothenberg, his partner.  

8.  In line for flight #2: Little girl in my space as we boarded.  Thinking, "If you want to crawl up my butt, little girl . . ." 

9.  Guy with grayish-brownish mullet and backward Yamaha hat in the row ahead of me.  He had his forehead pressed to the back of the seat in front of him for a long while, and he was slowly shaking his head "No." 

10.  Old woman beside me who kept flipping through a magazine with a brusque, almost petulant gesture.  She didn't stay on any page for more than five seconds.  (I counted.)  She did this for half an hour straight and bugged the shit out of me.  Then she asked if I wanted to look at the magazine (Woman's Day).  I looked at the cover for a second and said no thanks.  Felt a little guilty.  (She was probably just nervous.  I would have taken it from her if it had been a People.)  Then she started loudly flipping the pages again.   

[Bonus: First thing my mom said to me when picking me up was, "Your hair has wings.  You look like a goldfish."  Thanks.]

1 comment :

  1. This list made me laugh until I cried. It felt familiar and endearing.

    ReplyDelete

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